Post Surgical Follow-Up

Since I started IVF, I have built a process for doctor appointments.  Shave, if necessary.  Pick out fun socks (sometimes theme-based for the appointment).  Drink lots of water (on blood draw days).  Mentally prepare to see Wandy (the transvaginal ultrasound for those that easily forget).  Empty my bladder before doctor comes into the room.  Hide my panties in my purse when undressing.  (Am I the only one that finds it funny that we hide our panties from a doctor that knows the ins and outs of our nether regions?!  The panties are just too sacred, Doc.)

Well, I followed most of that process for my post-op appointment with Dr. Nilson yesterday.  Then, the strangest thing happened.  The nurse took us into an exam room and gave me no instructions to undress before she closed the door behind her.  She simply said Dr. Nilson would be in shortly to talk to us.

While we were waiting, we had the honor of listening to someone’s ultrasound heartbeats through the wall.  They were loud enough that Todd was able to clock them at 144 beats per minute.  Congratulations, Momma.  This is not something that would ever happen at Dr. Bundren or Dr. McKinney’s offices.  Neither would the 95% of patients with pregnant bellies/newborn babies in the lobby.  However, you learn to take things with a grain of salt…or hide in the bathroom crying until the nurse calls your name.  I’ve never done the latter, but give me a few hormone shots and I wouldn’t put it past me.

I digress.

So, we were waiting in this exam room for Dr. Nilson when Todd pointed out that the only equipment in the room was a lamp with a swivel neck.  He also pointed out that it was considerably larger than Wandy, and we both got a good laugh. 

Next, we noticed that his table in the room was covered with three different times of long-term birth control.  Seriously?!  You have to laugh at that irony, people.  The final straw was when we realized that the Mirena IUD was the same design as an anchor.  (This would be a good time to mention that I randomly chose to wear my anchor socks that day.)  I’m glad we can make each other laugh.

Dr. Nilson came in, and I wish we had set a timer on this appointment because it was so quick.  He asked how I was doing.  I told him mostly fine with one complaint.  He assured me that it was nothing to be concerned about.  Then, Todd asked if my uterine septum could grow back since he just removed it again after Dr. Bundren did in August 2012.  Nilson proceeded to explain how the uterine septum works and is removed.  Basically, Dr. Bundren just didn’t remove enough.  The best part was when he explained that “back in the day,” they had to insert a light into the woman’s abdomen during the uterine septum removal.  When they could see the light shining through her uterus, they would stop cutting on the septum.  We were bumfuzzled.  God, thank you for allowing Western medicine to have such awesome advances in technology.

Anyway, Dr. Nilson asked how I was.  I said mostly fine.  He confirmed I was completely fine.  He drew us a picture of a uterus pre- and post-op septum removal.  We left.  Stop the timer.

Literally, we hit the parking lot, turned to each other, scratched our heads in the way that only Dr. Bundren can do best (Bundren patients know the scratch), and asked each other what just happened.  I’m not sure what the need for that appointment was, but it gave us a good laugh…well, several good laughs.

I also got to see a girl from Infertile Myrtles that I haven’t seen since she got pregnant.  That was an added bonus and exceptional timing.

All is well on the surgery side.  D&C was a success.  Miscarriage is over.  Life can move forward.